• mrbubblesort@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    https://www.politico.com/news/2023/11/06/trump-civil-fraud-trial-00125515

    “I’m not a windmill person,” he said at one point.

    “I have a castle,” he said at another.

    Of his golf course in Aberdeen, Scotland, he testified: “At some point, maybe in my very old age, I’ll go there and do the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen. Aberdeen is the oil capital of Europe, very rich,” Trump began to say, but he was interrupted by the judge shouting, “Irrelevant!” Trump murmured, “It is.”

    Hours into his testimony, Trump attempted to read from a piece of paper he retrieved from his pocket. “I’d love to read this, your honor, if I could. Am I allowed to do that?” Trump asked. The judge said no.

    On his way out of court, Kise further applauded Trump’s performance, telling reporters: “In 33 years, I’ve never had a witness testify better.”

    This would be a blockbuster comedy if it wasn’t real

    • Bananigans@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      The way reality keeps pirating the onion’s articles, it’s a wonder they’re still in business.

    • Knusper@feddit.de
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      1 year ago

      Hours into his testimony, Trump attempted to read from a piece of paper he retrieved from his pocket. “I’d love to read this, your honor, if I could. Am I allowed to do that?” Trump asked. The judge said no.

      Now I’m just imagining him reading a chapter of Shakespeare or something, like he thought he was in literature club.

      Not that I could imagine Trump visiting a literature club, but I can imagine him thinking it.

  • shalafi@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Oh god.

    During his testimony, he often sat with his shoulders slumped and his hands clasped between his legs. On occasion, he crossed his arms over his chest and looked down his nose.

    Like a toddler being called on his misbehavior.

    Trump testified that he believed he was worth more than his financial statements reflected, concluding: “Therefore, you have no case.”

    “I said it so it’s TRUUUUUU!” What is this shit? “It’s fake and gay and so are you!”

    “I have a castle,” he said at another.

    And I have a racecar bed. Jesus fucking Christ.

    “I am being forced to take the witness stand tomorrow in a SHAM trial…

    He never had to take the stand in the first place. He didn’t even have to be in the courtroom.

    • torknorggren@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      He never had to take the stand in the first >place. He didn’t even have to be in the courtroom.

      I thought he did have to take the stand, but didn’t have to be there for the rest of the trial. AFAIK he’s compelled to testify (or take the fifth, but he and the kids have to do one or the other).

  • MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca
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    1 year ago

    I’m sure he meant that “it is” the oil capital of Europe; but I choose to believe that he was agreeing with the judge that it is irrelevant.