That’s not the point! Like what differentiates it? Just because the sex happened in Illinois? That’s nothing special. What might make it special is pulling a Belmont transfer when she least expects it…like in the back of a Volkswagen…

As an Illinoian, I am curious about Illinois sex. It also reminds me of a joke.

• Why does corn in Illinois lean east?

…Because Indiana sucks and Iowa blows.

I have too much of a backlog of games i haven’t played yet. I did not buy anything. Friendly reminder to play your playlist before buying a new game.

I’ve eaten it. It’s basically a slighty jazzed-up Dave’s single burger with a sauce I’ll call “interesting” instead of having their normal ketchup/mustard/mayo (personally hate mayo on burgers). It’s tangy with a little spice/zest (cayenne?) and I didn’t think it was great. Interesting novelty, but I won’t be having it again.

And batshit crazy weird. Let’s not forget that

Sponsored by Big Parma?? I’ll see myself out…

Lover by Taylor Swift. Also Toxic by Brittany

Lock this monster up

Titties dragged through the garden?

Then as a man, I choose to act like a girly-Man©. See? Has Man© and that symbol makes it official. That means I can do anything <‘ronswanson meme.jpg’> Checkmate. Easy victory

People of walmart…man, i just don’t know what to expect anymore. The Jerry Springer of superstores?

Buttery mails!

Right? Like does it come with good benefits and a 401k match too? I mean I’m already sold but the highwayman job is quite lacking in that space. Asking for a friend

And very punchable too

Right? I know Floridaman gets a lot of it but the whole “Florida or Ohio” is definitely a thing

Floridaman strikes again!

tHe SmArTeSt MaN iN tHe UnIvErSe. Doing small brain things again

Ok you got me there so now I guess i better get to posting. Well done!

I know right? You show up and be like “One mansion, please” and the realtor says something like “sure, our cheapest one is $2M”.

So you reach into your pocket and out comes the exact change of $2m! Bust is it

On my 3rd playthrough of Fallout: New Vegas