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Joined 2 months ago
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Cake day: March 10th, 2026

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  • White man who lived in China here chiming in.

    The racism, or at least prejudices and a lack of understanding that cause racism, are very real.

    Asia benefited from being near the top of the racist hierarchy of lies that Europeans instituted in the 19th century and also mostly learn about Black people from Hollywood films. (There’s also a really odd trend of New Right and crypto-fash talking points getting popular and spread around Chinese social media.)

    In China at least, dating is seen as valid only in the path to marriage, and family and kids is an expected and socially impressed upon goal. To the point where plenty of women in China have kids they don’t want because of familial and social pressure.

    At the same time, Asian society is very colourist which combined with having ingested the racist hierarchy somewhat and only really knowing Black people and culture from Hollywood isn’t a great start.

    Rounding it off, I China at least is a desire for in group marriage. Foreigners are seen as a risky choice, who could leave and don’t share the same cultural values (regardless of the truth of it).

    White people get more of a benefit of a doubt, but there’s still pressure against a Chinese-White relationship. I’ve heard of plenty of families putting pressure that ens inter-ethnic relationships, and there is definitely more pressure against Chinese-Black relationships. (Both cases also, sexistly, exacerbated when Chinese women, foreign man.)

    Don’t think this is anything new or not know, sadly.

    If the family is supportive, things work a lot better - unsurprisingly. But with Asian value of family, if the family are openly against it, it’s very unlikely to work out.