Like everything there’s some puritan morals involved. Most of which are around how sex and sexual desire are gross and not important. Couple that with the idea that suffering makes you a good person they all connect.

Also I think media plays a big role as well. Some toxic relationships are glorified in rom-coms and other media. Add in the normalization of weaponized jealousy in reality TV. Throw in the new micro cheating that the Internet and relationships experts who make mountains out of molehills. It’s a complex mix

If you are really interested in learning more about infidelity I would suggest you read / listen to Dan Savages’s columns / podcast. Unsurprisingly there are a lot of different calls and discussions about fidelity and monogamy. I would also suggest you read Ester Perel groundbreaking novel The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity

To answer your question directly infidelities are fairly common because monogamy is difficult and society typically puts a lot of stress and pressure on monogamy that makes it even more difficult. The foremost is the idea that monogamy as a default setting and that one person can be everything for one person sexually, emotionally etc… So we have a situation where two people are assuming that their partner will be the only person they can be attracted to, the one person that can fulfill all their emotional needs and will have to be a perfect roommate / life mate. This coupled with the idea that you have to be perfect at monogamy or you are a complete failure at it. So you have a hard situation and hard expectations so people slip and some people who slip on something small (a micro-cheating which is a ridiculous concept) they go all the way. All these expectations are common in “Straight-land” while those in “queer-land” have a different set of expectation that work better for everyone.

We should all make monogamy an regular opt-in conversation for relationships (I would suggest ~6 months in when you go exclusive and then at most every 5 years). Moreover, we should understand our monogamist partner finds other people attractive and chooses to not pursue anything not that they don’t find anyone else attractive. Finally, we should understand a our partner needs friends, hobbies and confidant who are not us to rely on. Until that happens “cheating” will likely remain something that happens fairly regularity

There are science behind cooking but its mostly with methods instead of inputs. If anyone is interested [Salt Fat Acid Heat](https://www.saltfatacidheat.com/] and (The Food Lab)[https://www.amazon.com/Food-Lab-Cooking-Through-Science/dp/0393081087] are more scientific about methods and made for home cooks. You can also look at On Food and Cooking which is much more textbook like about the science of cooking. Its there but not in standardized measurements and units for recipes

I was thinking saying that expecting precision from a natural product is a fools errand. So embrace the imperfection and go crazy

I was a professional chemist for around ~7 and love to cook. My suggestion is to stop expecting precision with an imprecise and natural product like cooking. Are your lemons larger? They also might be sweeter, tarter, juicer etc. than others. Same thing with teaspoons. The spices you are using may be more or less concentrated than who wrote it.

Lean into the uncertainty and be free. Double or even triple spices to see if you like it. Measure with your heart

Relevant XKCD

Different kind of crypto nerd but still

I loved my EEEPC. I used while study abroad before smartphones were common. It was great to carry on me at all times. If I needed directions or to check on a website I would sit at a café / restaurant / bar to have a coffee / wine / beer to grab the wifi. It was great and small enough that I could carry it open if needed. I loved it. I thought it was the future until the iPad took over

My wife also has a better sense of smell then me. We don’t fight about it but I have spent a bunch of time trying to find the phantom smell.

She’s pregnant now and her super smell is even more potent. So I had to do a lot of kitchen cleaning and I had to a lot of cooking. It’s a thing for sure

Sometimes I think I would love to try playing AD&D in the competitive Gygax method. It would be fun to get a table of skilled players and complete against another table to see how far you can get through a dungeon and get the most gold. It seems like a wildly different way to play and would be kind of fun for a competitive - cooperative method.

What they used to saying in the gay marriage rights movement was the rights of marriage don’t kick in the good times but in the bad. It’s all the sickness and death and divorce when it’s needed.

Its such a big day they made a pretty okay Kevin Costner movie about it

I know there are certain legal situations where an official marriage changes who has certain rights, but aren’t those same rights available if you make other legally-official decisions E.G. a will or trusts, etc?

This is not the case. Marriage gives you a lot of specific rights that can be covered by other legal documents but never together and marriage will override it. This is one of the main goals for giving gay marriage is all of the legal benefits of marriage which are expansive and complete. (This is of course in the USA this is not the case in other locations.)

There was a few legal pushes to separate these legal benefits from marriage into different legal rights that can be granted piecemeal. If you are intersted I would read The Other Significant Others which talks about people who prioritize friendships over marriage and how they interact with their “other significant other” which includes the legal discussions.

Dealing with the afterlife and the planes is really up to you. I think making this a little unclear, vague and inconsistent leads to a little mystery to the game. In my game I would follow something similar to what you had laid out above. Here is how I would run this for my campaign.

• The players would have to find out where their soul went. This would be some adventure to find this out by petitioning Kelemvor or another method to ensure they find the correct location
• The players find a method to travel to the plane (I would do olympus because it would have some fun fights). I would either have some quest to get a planar aligned tuning fork (if they have plane shift) or some kind of planar tunnel to get there.
• Once there they will have to find the soul (who I would treat as a different creature for spells like scrying / divinations). I would have them continuously fighting and dying from the same fight.
• After they defeat this boss again, I would have some RP / skill check to convince the soul to come with them because their memories would be wiped / reduced. I would have time move very differently for the part vs this player.
• On the way back if the soul dies outside their fight arena I would have it dissolve into the essence of the plan (a.k.a. DEAD except for wish) or return back to their fight arena.

This sounds like a fun series of adventures.

This makes a lot of sense because as we have been seeing over the last decades or so is that digital only socialization isn’t a replacement for in person socialization. Increased social media usage shows increased loneliness not a decrease. It makes sense that something even more fake like ChatGPT would make it worse.

I don’t want to sound like a luddite but overly relying on digital communications for all interactions is a poor substitute for in person interactions. I know I have to prioritize seeing people in the real world because I work from home and spending time on Lemmy during the day doesn’t fulfill.

If you would like to live there someday I would recommend that as your goal. I would recommend you start doing some research on permaculture which is about building wholly sustainability. Part of this sustainability is financial and piecewise building and investment. So if you want to build and live on this one day you will need the money for it.

So start with leasing the land for at least 1 year to get some cash and for you to better understand where you might want to build a structure and what you need. This allows you to plan and see what part would fit a dwelling the best. This also lets you figure out what you need for this house (i.e. water, electricity, waste removal etc.) as well as figure out how this investment can make money for you. Start small and build modularly. Your dwelling may start on as shack or even a place to set up a tent and grow larger. Same with whatever you end up doing with the land.

Permaculture talks about building food forests which are sustainable year round sources of food, goods or materials. Some of which you can sell or use yourself. These are typically perennial plants, vines and trees which all grow off each other and make a beautiful space. This can be your space for “remote working” either for yourself or visitors.

While planning on starting on this you can continue to lease your land to farmers as you slowly take it over yourself for your bigger vision. This is suppose to be small, slow but sustainable growth to your final vision.

I always feel nervous preordering anything. I got a new Fitbit so I think I have some time before it fails so I can see how this rePebble works out. If it is as good as it looks I might just get it. 30 day estimated battery life is amazing

To combat this you can fill a heat tolerant water bottle with some boiled water, wrap it in a shirt or sweater to prevent burning, and put it into your sleeping bag to warm it up quickly.

The first time I did this I ended up so hot that I had to take it out. Its a wonderful trick and I have woken up spooning the cool water bottle in the morning

Role-playing game isn’t about miniatures

I feel like miniatures is a separate and interrelated hobby. I don’t really enjoy it but its nice to have something physical for combat. That being said free VTTs do so to replace the need for that.

It’s not about the ogre, it’s about whether choices have an impact on the story.

This is exactly my point is that by relying on it constantly there is no actual real choice and its just lying about railroading the players. If I have the choice about going to clear out the undead in the forbidden temple or clear out the bandits on the outskirts of town and behind the scenes its the same dungeon map I will never know nor will I care. But if I go to kill the undead at the forbidden temple and end up at the bandit camp why make this choice? I love being able to re-use material like this, (In fact I had a dungeon that was an extra-dimensional space where the players got to choose between monsters and demons which used the same map). Same thing if a group of assassins is coming to attack the party and they are deciding between going shopping or the spa. The assassins will find them either way at whatever place they are doing. This is a great use. But if I heard rumor about these assassins and attempt to hide from them but no matter what I do they will always find me that is removing choice.

I think its more of an advanced technique that given as some beginner friendly advice. Its easy to use it all the time to reduce agency instead of using it sparingly.

If you are dungeon mastering I would recommend avoiding the Quantum Ogre as much as possible. The idea here is to use the same encounter depending on whatever decision the party chooses. This is tempting because this reduces prep work and can reuse information. However, if the decision doesn’t have any consequence why make the players make this decision? TTRPG are about collaborative story telling so decisions so matter and if they don’t why am I even playing. If you want to reduce your prep maybe have the same monsters but at least change the terrain or starting criteria.

If there is decision lead clues about what might be different between the options if it is important decision. These clues might not be obvious but that is what skills checks are for. Make decisions worthwhile so players feel engaged