Tank, fish

If it’s typically sunny where you yoga, wear a mirror ball bodysuit. Anyone that stares will get an eye full of glorious sunbeams.

Alternatively, get a big, well-trained dog. The kind that will orbit you closely without a leash.

Shoulda made a left turn at Tatooine

Skipped leg day

Cats with frickin’ laser beams

Pac-rat

French Hens are just pretentious chicken fries

Alabama got rid of slavery in 2022.

WTF CA?

I think any truck gets a pass. Even a Honda Civic raised an inch or two, slap a bigger greenhouse on it, and send it on it’s way as a CUV.

I suspect the growth spurt has more to do with “tax loophole trucks.” I might be wrong on both points.

Make it stop

I can hear this one: a deep, gravelly, male voice just going “ahhhhhhhhhh!”

Don’t buy the cow if you’re lactose intolerant.

“It belongs in a museum!”

Filled in rectangles are so cold and impersonal. The scribbles are organic and remind me I need to brush my hair. Who cares if someone reverse engineers OP’s mom’s name?

Pronouncing realtor like “real-uhh-torrrrr”

'Should of" instead of “should’ve”

Don’t leave us hanging! Finish the story! Please let the person that said “it is what it is” die a gruesome, dark, and slow death. But not me because I didn’t really say it… I was quoting, and that doesn’t count.

Magic Eightball

Très jolie!

No shit? That’s a whole-ass mf chicken on there?