I personally would prefer it not be used around here in general. I don’t delete it overall, but I will occasionally depending on its usage. I have known too many good people with intellectual disabilities who were abused by bullies calling them that word.
People are bullied by a lot of words, stupid, dumb, crazy, ugly, gross. Context of the words used is what matters. Obviously bullying is not acceptable, but a self-deprecating joke is okay.
Ok but like so are the terms idiot and dumb and moron. We’ve turned them all into insults derived from their original meanings, but that doesn’t mean we should never use the words. Context matters.
Hey, I’ve got a (albeit very minor) mental disability and I use the word casually around friends all the time, but I just want to point out that it’s you and me that are tainting the word, your comment makes it sound like “other” people are the cause of it no longer being a clinical diagnosis rather than an insult.
That being said it’s definitely falling out of favor in the public eye. It probably won’t be too long before it’s viewed at or close to the same level as the hard R. I think a lot of us are getting cancelled in 20 years.
Using it for a good natured joke or even self deprecating humor can have a positive effect on it.
I really don’t think you’re gonna have many people agreeing with you on this one… it’s hard to say a joke is good natured when it uses a word that defines a group of people as an insult. The context isn’t going to matter to someone with a disability who’s been called a retard maliciously. To use the same example as before, there are plenty of “good natured” people that use the hard R for humor and it pretty much is never gonna land. Or when a gay person hears a straight person say something is gay, they don’t really care how many gay friends you have.
Just to be clear I’m not trying to tell you not to use it. Like I said before, I’m an asshole and use it with my friends too. But I realize this makes me an asshole, and instead of trying to spread my asshole around (phrasing…) and convince the people I’m offending that they shouldn’t be offended, I keep it to my circle of asshole friends and accept it when people tell me I’m being an asshole.
As someone who enjoys language, you understand that it changes over time. The time period where “retard” is a word that can be thrown around on a TV show without repercussion is coming to an end, just like the time period where calling gay people fags and black people negro or worse came to an end before. Language is not static, we can try to pretend it is but that’s just not how it works.
Hope this didn’t come off as a rant or anything. Just trying to give my understanding, one retard to another.
Sorry… why does it matter that it was in a Disney show when you were growing up?
Again, ‘retarded’ has been an insult for a very long time. It hasn’t even been federally legal to use the term “mental retardation” since 2010 (more than “barely a decade”) and by that time, the only people using the term was the federal government. The same federal government that used ‘negro’ until the 2000s. Are you going to claim ‘negro’ was the polite way to refer to a person in 1995 next?
But sure, call it polite. People who are actually bullied by it would disagree with you.
I like how you ignored every link I posted and continue to insist it’s polite despite the Special Olympics and a person with Down Syndrome explaining exactly why it is offensive.
Basically you’re telling me that you know better about what offends “retards” than the “retards” do themselves.
The link from NPR shows in 2012 it was offensive but still being compared to “Idiot” or “Moron” which I’d wager is where it was at the start of being used as an insult.
My god, you didn’t even read them. Bailey literally says in the NPR article:
She said that it’s not offensive and that it’s the same as saying cretin or moron, and it’s definitely not.
“She” being Ann Coulter, who used the slur to begin with. So sure, it’s comparable to ‘moron’… if you’re Ann Coulter, which I hope you are not.
Again- It is offensive, I do not like to see it here, and I will delete it sometimes.
That is my final word on it as a mod and I advise you not to try to argue with me further on this.
I personally would prefer it not be used around here in general. I don’t delete it overall, but I will occasionally depending on its usage. I have known too many good people with intellectual disabilities who were abused by bullies calling them that word.
People are bullied by a lot of words, stupid, dumb, crazy, ugly, gross. Context of the words used is what matters. Obviously bullying is not acceptable, but a self-deprecating joke is okay.
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Ok but like so are the terms idiot and dumb and moron. We’ve turned them all into insults derived from their original meanings, but that doesn’t mean we should never use the words. Context matters.
Hey, I’ve got a (albeit very minor) mental disability and I use the word casually around friends all the time, but I just want to point out that it’s you and me that are tainting the word, your comment makes it sound like “other” people are the cause of it no longer being a clinical diagnosis rather than an insult.
That being said it’s definitely falling out of favor in the public eye. It probably won’t be too long before it’s viewed at or close to the same level as the hard R. I think a lot of us are getting cancelled in 20 years.
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I really don’t think you’re gonna have many people agreeing with you on this one… it’s hard to say a joke is good natured when it uses a word that defines a group of people as an insult. The context isn’t going to matter to someone with a disability who’s been called a retard maliciously. To use the same example as before, there are plenty of “good natured” people that use the hard R for humor and it pretty much is never gonna land. Or when a gay person hears a straight person say something is gay, they don’t really care how many gay friends you have.
Just to be clear I’m not trying to tell you not to use it. Like I said before, I’m an asshole and use it with my friends too. But I realize this makes me an asshole, and instead of trying to spread my asshole around (phrasing…) and convince the people I’m offending that they shouldn’t be offended, I keep it to my circle of asshole friends and accept it when people tell me I’m being an asshole.
As someone who enjoys language, you understand that it changes over time. The time period where “retard” is a word that can be thrown around on a TV show without repercussion is coming to an end, just like the time period where calling gay people fags and black people negro or worse came to an end before. Language is not static, we can try to pretend it is but that’s just not how it works.
Hope this didn’t come off as a rant or anything. Just trying to give my understanding, one retard to another.
I’m sorry, it was not “the polite way to characterize someone” barely a decade ago. It was a big insult when I was in school in the 80s and 90s.
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Sorry… why does it matter that it was in a Disney show when you were growing up?
Again, ‘retarded’ has been an insult for a very long time. It hasn’t even been federally legal to use the term “mental retardation” since 2010 (more than “barely a decade”) and by that time, the only people using the term was the federal government. The same federal government that used ‘negro’ until the 2000s. Are you going to claim ‘negro’ was the polite way to refer to a person in 1995 next?
But sure, call it polite. People who are actually bullied by it would disagree with you.
https://www.specialolympics.org/stories/impact/why-the-r-word-is-the-r-slur
https://www.spreadtheword.global/resource-archive/r-word-effects
https://www.npr.org/2012/11/05/164342230/a-special-olympian-on-pundits-use-of-the-r-word
https://www.verywellfamily.com/what-is-the-r-word-3105651
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I like how you ignored every link I posted and continue to insist it’s polite despite the Special Olympics and a person with Down Syndrome explaining exactly why it is offensive.
Basically you’re telling me that you know better about what offends “retards” than the “retards” do themselves.
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My god, you didn’t even read them. Bailey literally says in the NPR article:
“She” being Ann Coulter, who used the slur to begin with. So sure, it’s comparable to ‘moron’… if you’re Ann Coulter, which I hope you are not.
Again- It is offensive, I do not like to see it here, and I will delete it sometimes.
That is my final word on it as a mod and I advise you not to try to argue with me further on this.