If a man finds a girl who is a virgin, who is not engaged, and seizes her and lies with her and they are discovered, then the man who lay with her shall give to the girl’s father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall become his wife because he has violated her; he cannot divorce her all his days. Deuteronomy 22:28-29
Who ever said anything about sheep? But it’s fifty shekels anyway. Damn inflation!
It’s real. He ended up raising almost $500k and was able to evict 10 families that Christmas. Not as easy as it sounds.
Then he punched a puppy. He just fucking punched it.
What a hero! He’s just a few child rapes away from becoming a republican senator.
Wow, how dare you. Everyone knows it’s not really rape if you force the child to marry you afterward.
It’s the Lord’s will!
Her death due to complications of pregnancy in a child’s body is also His will. Time to find a new child-bride!
As long as you pay the father
Sure. Twenty shekels well invested.
Twenty shekels? Pay him two sheep as god intended.
Who ever said anything about sheep? But it’s fifty shekels anyway. Damn inflation!
And it’s ok, they had the abortion procedure in another state
After raising another 2000$ for a golden punching ring! What a hero!
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That makes me happy. I’m glad tourists on their Christmas vacation can now occupy a cosy Airbnb with surge pricing. The hero of Christmas.
Source?
They’re joking. If they weren’t, I’d have to stop joking about running a radical militia.